Join for FREE | Take the Tour Lost Password?
[x]

deviantART

 

Poem: Gravitational Pull by ~rainmanjr:iconrainmanjr:



I feel alone and ignored.  A crowded isolation.
Pursuing hopes that crash into nothingness.
Gravitational pull of circling bodies
Yet, the vacuum remains.

Affections unreturned.  Concern a one-way trip
Lonely truck stops offering empty food.
With no gas in their pumps
To give away.

Friendship between the covers of pressed wood
Good nutrition but not very sweet.
Salt and vinegar is better
Keeps perspective.

Warren Zevon thought it Splendid Isolation
It has some moments that's true.
Two, beginning and end
Eternity in between.

Sex a plug and socket for electricity’s flow
Tingling nerves fail @ sustainability.
Useless flagpole at days end
Empty, I need more.

Why believe in people who don’t appear?
Is this flesh and blood worth fitness?
Compassion the only reality?
Karma failings price?

                I
                S
                T
                I
                L
                L
                E
                X
                I
                S
                T
©2007-2009 ~rainmanjr
:iconrainmanjr:

Author's Comments

Everything drops, eventually.
The final 3 words are a quote from a 1950's movie called "The Incredible Shrinking Man." If you've seen the movie then you you'll get a lot out of 3 words. If not, then you should but they still finish off the piece well, I think.
Anyway, I'm mostly over it. :shrug:

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconsmackeldorf:
thats a quite nice and unique poem of isolation. quite liek the ending of spelling downwards. only suggestion being ryhm, but thats only because i love rhym no other particular reason (i personally believ it gives more impact) but what do I know eh?

--
"I'm not a stalker, i just want you for me and no-one else"
:iconrainmanjr:
Yeah, I've always thought poems need to rhyme, also. But it's the fashion (I guess) for them not to. I purposely created this one so that each stanza fell (longer on top line and shortest on bottom) instead of rhyming. In this way, structure played the heavier role :giggle:. Ending with the freefall at end.

--
"We are here to fart around. Don't let anyone tell you any different." - Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
:icondorkanese:
This is very similar to my own style of poetry, the little I've ever written. I rather like it. Kudos.

--
"Keep close the words of Syadasti: 'TIS AN ILL WIND THAT BLOWS NO MINDS."--The Principia Discordia
:iconrainmanjr:
Thank you. I only write poetry as an exercise in stretching my muscles. I don't pretend to be good at it. I read 2 other poets, Saturnineguise and WabyBishi, who are very good. After a while I guess they affect me and I spit one out. :altermind:

--
"We are here to fart around. Don't let anyone tell you any different." - Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
:iconsmackeldorf:
touché

--
"I'm not a stalker, i just want you for me and no-one else"
:iconrainmanjr:
Merci beaucoup, smackeldorf. One doesn't get many touches, anymore. I love your sig. line.

--
"We are here to fart around. Don't let anyone tell you any different." - Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
:iconsmackeldorf:
...you know im tempted to make some sort of twisted comment, but i'll hold it back. and lol thank you, i like yours too.

--
"I'm not a stalker, i just want you for me and no-one else"
:iconrainmanjr:
Never hold back a twisted comment. At least, not with me, youngling.

--
"We are here to fart around. Don't let anyone tell you any different." - Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
:iconsmackeldorf:
I'll bear that in mind

--
"I'm not a stalker, i just want you for me and no-one else"

Details

June 18, 2007
2.2 KB

Statistics

12
1 [who?]
88 (0 today)
0 (0 today)

Site Map